no drama mama

There are times I almost envy hermits. Like now.

A woman I've considered one of my best friends is not speaking to me, and hasn't since Thanksgiving. All over a man. Because I despise her boyfriend and have no interest in sharing social occasions with him.

It's very disheartening. For the last three years, I've been an unwilling participant in their relationship. I've listened to her cry, whine, complain and bitch about him, about how he's treated her, about the way he talks to her and puts her last in his list of priorities. I've watched him, with my own eyes, as he acted like she was invisible and hit on and kissed on other women, right in front of her. I've offered my advise when asked for it. I've given my opinion when wanted. I've offered my shoulder for sympathy. I've said what she needed to hear, what no one else would say to her. I've put words in her mouth that she then used in conversations with him to express how she felt.

And now, after three years, when I've reached my limit and don't want to have anything at all to do with him, she thinks I owe her an apology. Because I leave if he shows up. Quietly and without a fuss, just getting my check and saying my goodbyes, but as far as she's concerned, I have no right to that choice.

She has a history of bad relationships, of choosing and sticking with the wrong men so it's no surprise that she's doing it again. It's no surprise that he does what he wants and she takes him back and lets him back into her life. That's who she is. For some reason, that's the kind of relationship she thinks she deserves.

I owe her an apology for seeing him as the asshole jerk he is and refusing to spend my precious free time in his company.

Yea. That makes sense.

I'm done. I like my life to run smoothly. Quietly. I don't like being caught up in someone else's lifelong dramatic production. I played a part in her love-life theatre for way too long.

And now I'm done. I'm perfectly happy spending time with other friends, with my kids and my grandson. I'm perfectly happy away from a weekly crisis of emotion.

I'm done. As sad as it is to think of ending a friendship, sometimes it's step that has to be taken.

Like I said. I envy hermits.